A Day in the Life of a Yoga Teacher

7:00am : gnnnh? What, already? Aw my shoulders / back / hips / bum / thighs / body, do I really have to wake up? Feeling the Ashtanga class of yesterday, ouch.

7:05am: ok kapalbhati and co., here I am.

7:10am: BOOYAH, LET’S TAKE OVER THE WORLD! First, let’s move that body a little bit.

7:11am: ouch

7:12am: argh

7:14am: gnnnnnnnnn

7:21am: let’s sit for meditation, if I can cross my legs, gnnnnn. I am feeling like s**t. No really. Bleh. Can I stay home? Wait, oh, focus *breathing deep* I am REALLY feeling like s**t. Wait, that was the end? How come I am not feeling better, grounded, at peace, and, you know, the way we are supposed to feel after meditation? Why am I still feeling like a big pile of poo?

7:30am: let’s go downstairs for breakfast but first HEY LULU *MWAH* KISS KISS PURR MEOW CUDDLE CUDDLE KITTYWANTFOOD ah yes of course.

8:00am: WHOA JALA NETI WOOO! LET’S TAKE OVER THE WORLD!

9:00am: not gonna make it through this morning at the office, my breakfast has trouble staying in my stomach.

*PAUSE work work gossip oh wait no we are not supposed to do this work work*

1pm: made it, time to go home. I would die for one of these goat cheese sandwiches with honey, nuts and arugula. Now I am hungry.

2pm: LULU HELLO *MWAH* KISS KISS MEOW KITTYWANTOUTSIDE ah yes, of course. Uh oh, so where is the sandwich going to go? Let’s have a cup of tea.

2pm: I think I was supposed to go food shopping. Meh. Let’s stay inside and make no physical effort at all, I have some admin to catch up on.

2:34pm: bloody VAT return.

2:54pm: I’d rather type this class *type type type*

4:00pm: bleh.

5:30pm: time to go to the studio. Oh public transportation success!

6:00pm: studio. Cold. Holy cow. Change. Mats. Blocks. Bleh. Oh my downdog is arthritic. And being upside down is no good, no no good.

6:37pm: *beep* “am still waiting for tram, can only see wrong ones, will probably be late” ooookaaaaay.

6:50pm: “Manue? We are parked on Nottherightplace Square, which way do we have to go to come to you?” ooooooookkkaaaaaaay. Still feeling like hell broke loose in my stomach. Now this is gonna be fun.

7:15pm: let’s start that little group private class, chant Om. Only 15 minutes late. My stomach hell is on pause.

8:40pm: “Namaste, thank you” “Aw Manue thanks to *YOU*!” My friends’ monkey minds have slowed down for a while apparently. Blushing.

8:56pm: oh well, body gave me a break for 90 minutes, now it’s back on s**t mode.

8:58pm: oh public transportation success, on the way home. Twice in one day, worth mentioning.

9:21pm: home. HELLO LULU KISS KISS MEOW KITTYWANTFOOD yes OBVIOUSLY, IT’S BLOODY LATE! You eat for me kitty, bleh.

10:30pm: oh, why don’t I write about my day? Or how to teach even when you feel like s**t should be the subtitle. Yes, let’s do this and tear down the glamourous yoga teacher myth. Bleh.

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